Author: Antony Williams

Born @85, a fiery ram at heart, banker nerd, wealth buff, digital marketing enthusiast, story builder, self-help guide, diary writer, blog explorer, SEO/SEM lover, business idearist, freestyle dancer, music kicker.... & on a high to explore and get a trance of all the mind-blowing industry's out there!!

In Love Are Young Boys Really Choosing Girls Or Vice Versa (A Confidential Report)

In Love Are Young Boys Really Choosing Girls Or Vice Versa (A Confidential Report)

Let me ask you this Question?

At the start of a relationship is the boy in love selecting the girl or is the girl, who is actually selecting the boy?

Does a boy really have choices or is it a girl accepting a boy?

It’s confusing, right?

Let me break this down so you can think about it.

FYI: The information mentioned below is only for boys (but am not stopping you from reading if you are a girl).

Am sure you would have proposed a girl by now, unless and until you are living under a rock alone or that you are not interested in girls!

But you see there might be no chance or even fewer chances where a girl would have proposed to you, at least until now.

Did you know that this chance is 0.0001% of all the girls that you have met in life so far?

Trust me this is from not just my experience, but what I have seen or understood from all my friends (boy) and peers who have been trying to be in a love relationship with a girl.

girl and boy in a love relationship

Right from stalking (not in the wrong way) them daily to trying to impress them by celebrating their parents’ birthday (lol).

Am not saying that you are not good-looking or charming for girls to queue up to you.

Hey no offense, but believe me a girl in love who wants a long-term relationship doesn’t fall for you (boy) because you are charming, or good-looking.

There are a few other factors, which we will definitely discuss towards the end of this conversation.

Now think about this – you proposed to a girl, and she said nothing (yeah, complete silence – I ####ing hate this part), said she will get back to you like some of those HR folks.

And you get frustrated for weeks, without a reply. (This is the exact reason how I became damn good at Sales – don’t ask me why)

And finally, with loads of embarrassment and expectation, you ask her out again.

Still, She doesn’t reply. (This is how I got extremely good at sales)

So let’s get back to the picture: you moved on to the next girl something like benching (look it up on the search tab above) in the latest GenZ lingo.

And damn, this new girl instantly says a Yes, WTF 1.

And now you feel like you are in love again or something with this new girl.

So You take her out, have fun dating, have coffee, and a lot more.

And you in the most dumbest way possible post your personal feelings about her on the internet and upload mushy pics with her on social and WhatsApp statuses – why man?

girl and boy in a love relationship

Then it happens, one midnight you get a DM on WhatsApp from the other girl (first one) who didn’t even respond to you even after proposing to her for the 2nd/3rd time – that’s WTF 2.

You are again confused now as you seriously liked option 1, and dreamt of spending quality time with her, but ended up getting option 2 only.

Then you start to self doubt your capabilities and also your relationship with the 2nd Girl (which is quite unfair).

Your brain and heart try to play games with you, they debate on the options you have.

They start easily messing up your professional life slowly.

Then suddenly you are not able to focus on that presentation, your client meetings no longer end up with deal closures, and your colleagues start complaining to higher management that you are mostly off work.

You royally start missing the real game while your entire focus is now on whether is it option 1 or option 2 or is there even an option 3 (man, this is insane if there are more options coming in).

You actually wanted the 1st girl but got the 2nd girl whom you needed.

Want vs Need is the most ####ed up situation in anyone’s life ever, whether it is in a career or personal life.

It’s a constant tug-of-war between desires and necessities, aspirations and practicality.

In a career, you might want a high-paying job with prestige and perks, but you might need a role that aligns with your values, provides work-life balance, fuels your passion, or even gives you that space to think for yourself and make your own decisions and try new things for boosting revenue for your company rather than stick to the traditional book of how-to-do-it-only-this-way. The glamorous job may look appealing with a fancy designation, but if it drains your mental energy or compromises your long-term goals, you end up questioning your choices.

Similarly, in your personal life, you might want a luxurious lifestyle, material possessions, or a relationship that seems perfect on the surface. However, what you truly need could be emotional fulfillment, meaningful connections, or peace of mind or just financial freedom. The shiny distractions often make it harder to recognize what genuinely matters.

This struggle often leads to confusion and emotional turmoil.

You see balancing wants and needs requires deep self-awareness, prioritization, and ignoring what society wants you to be or do.

Now I hope you understand WTF I was trying to help you see through?

It’s about understanding the difference between short-term gratification and long-term happiness. Don’t try to be a monkey imitating another.

Only then can you make choices that truly serve your growth and well-being.

Make yourself happy before trying to make someone else happy – especially parents.

Because if you are happy then folks around you will be automatically happy – they will not have a choice to be otherwise.

<So are you still going to get what you Want or Need?>

Here below is my latest book on how sales folks can improve their pitch – do check it out:

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Don't Be That Silly Joker Juggling Work Life Balance Act

Don’t Be That Silly Joker Juggling Work Life Balance Act

Work-Life Balance

Mom-Wife balance

Boys-trip Family-trip balance

a lady trying hard to work and talk to her parents at the same time on a phone

Veg Non-veg balance

Savings-Expenses balance

Office-School event balance (for parents)

School-Friends College-Friends balance

Girlfriend ex-girlfriend balance

Cook at-home order in balance

Mutual fund gold balance

Damn...

All these have been created by two kinds of people:

1) Who got stuck in life because one of these things mentioned above failed and never worked for them

2) Who got overwhelmed by the 1st kind of people and believed this was the new rule of life. And that it is mandatory for the so-called zen life.

And finally comes:

3) People like me who didn’t believe the people in categories 1 or 2 (a category I just realized while writing this), and took life and work as it came, to figure out that you cannot balance it forever. Each one will have its own priority some days. One will definitely overpower the other some days for sure.

Now for a reason, I know you are pissed reading this!

It’s because of the fact that all this while you believed in the whole concept of work-life balance.

But be with me and let me explain this in the next 7 minutes (I don’t promise anything like those influencers do, but am sure this will show you the reality like that Matrix movie did)—

Imagine this – let’s say on this Monday you have 3 very very important client meetings and real deals hanging on it. But on Saturday morning you are down with high fever and the doc says it’s dengue (I pray this doesn’t happen to you in real).

Now that’s it.

You are in this now.

What will you choose between work and life?

Will you be able to balance it?

Let me remind you dengue fever instantly stamps down your platelets to less than a lakh. You need at least 2 lakhs and above in your blood to survive.

Getting my point?

Now let me tell you – that was me down with dengue.

And do you know what happened to those 3 deals?

We cracked it.

We got it, all 3 deals. How?

Well, my colleagues took care of it without me in it anyway.

My point is – life and work happens, and it will happen for sure. You just can’t alter it. You just need to ensure that you feel & handle both.

You need to breathe both.

You need to have fun with both.

You need to ride both happily.

As, in the so-called work-life balance those wonderful already super-rich influencers are talking about on LinkedIn and YouTube that you are trying to chase always to make both ends happy – starts with Work first always, and then only Life comes.

Do you understand what I am trying to show you here?

You see, without work there is no life, drop this into your head.

I am not saying you work 60 hours 6 days a week, I am just saying you work when you have to work, really hard in that moment. And live life when you have to live that amazing life, really hard at that moment (I meant a vacation, meeting friends, or even just reading my content).

If you are not able to take a break don’t

If you are now able to meet friends at times don’t

It’s fine – be patient – wait, you will get another time.

I have missed birthdays, vacations, anniversaries, parties, weddings, funerals, and myself at times. And I really don’t have this word = sacrifice in my dictionary anymore.

But on the flip side, now if you have missed a sales deal, important meetings, and maybe a new job opening or a business opportunity – do you think it is going to come back?

No, I guess not – it’s gone forever.

But let me give you another POV – what if you got a business deal or crack a sales deal?

You are definitely gonna get some cash to pay for your next holiday.

You will definitely feel happier to party that night.

Don’t you think Work is what can drive that balance in your Life?

That’s it – I know it’s not that simple for your mind to accept this!

Don't chase balance, chase peace.

Right now, if you have read till now, am guessing that you are already at peace, then why think about balancing it?

Take breaks and ask out – it’s important.

Let’s say you are now deeply thinking about building a product feature that your clients have been asking for long. And you are thinking hard about it – whether should I build it, should I not, will it make more money, etc, and blah blah blah.

And you are not able to come to a conclusion yet. What can you do next?

Take a pause 4 mins max – call your mom tell her the situation in short, and explain it in the simplest way possible, in an extremely easy way that she can understand.

And damn!

Damn miracle, just listen to the insights that she has to tell you.

It so happened to me that I was trying to figure out a product pricing proposition. And guess who helped me finalize it?

Mom!

Yeah, am serious about this.

I know you might not be totally convinced here, but for me, that situation was real stuff. Again am not saying you always call mom, but you get my point – right?

Call someone who might understand your problem and give you a POV or a different worldview.

Don’t ask for a solution, please please never ask anyone for a solution.

It’s like asking for Chinese food in a South Indian cuisine restaurant. They will definitely have only the South Indian version of the Chinese food that you are thinking about.

As the solution is confusion, it’s also an illusion and pollution to your brain + heart.

Tell me this without cheating yourself!

Have you ever got a one-time permanent solution from anyone ever?

Think about it.

Well, I haven’t. And you shouldn’t even, expect it.

It’s like a painkiller that lasts for a couple of hours, and once the effect goes off you are back in the same pain, maybe more pain again!

Don’t take one!

Have you noticed this – some people will instantly give you a solution that worked for them and this might work for you, but just for a bit. Maybe just for a little bit. It won’t be long when you call someone else and ask for the same solution again.

This is the same thing that is happening to you when you are trying to ask people around on how to get the elixir or mojo to achieve work-life balance.

So don’t chase it work-life balance, just face it, embrace it, and erase it in real time.

Do what you have to, as your pension fund doesn’t grow much if you only invest in balanced funds, you also need equity funds to give you higher returns in the future.

Balance in anything will only give you balanced returns. And not higher returns. This is what I have learned in the last decade and it took me a decade to learn it – hope you don’t!

A friend once reminded me — if you are lazy in the “now”, “tomorrow” will be lazy to you while you try harder to progress in life.

You keep hustling, don’t get into work-life balance & #h#t!

As balance starts with a Bal that sounds like a Ball– it will be stupid to be on a Ball & trying to balance a Ball, don’t be a silly joker on a Ball Juggling Work Life Balance Act!

<So, are you still gonna chase Work-Life balance?/>

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I Am Tired – Really Exhausted

It’s almost the next day now, started working yesterday at 6 am!

Feeling tired.

I am so drained.

I just want to crash.

But a voice in me.

A burning sensation in me.

A craving in me.

Says that “I should not stop”, I will not dare stop and I can’t stop now.

I know I am reaching there. I am almost there; I know it, and I can feel it. I am preparing myself for the big game.

And when luck strikes again I should be prepared to take that shot.

I failed to make or finish a lot of shots. But I will not fail to take that shot.

If I don’t try for my own victory, then who else will try for me?

People think that I am a workaholic, nah – that’s fine, till it’s my war.

But I think that I should be realistically sensible as I haven’t reached there yet.

None knows my goals.

None understands my goals and why should they anyway?

I have always told my goals to the wrong people in the room. So I don’t do that anymore.

A workaholic is a character.

And I am that character when am working.

What else should one be, when working?

If I think about my family while working and think about work while am with family then I will never have any focus on what am trying to achieve.

Who am I?

Spiderman, Batman or Minnal Murali?

Well am all that, am everyone mentioned there!

Am a Spiderman at work.

Am a Batman to & with my family.

And am Minnal Murali to my friends.

Only if I am them can I be myself!

My goals change every year, last year it was X and after I achieved it became Y. The chase is always on.

Without a goal what is life all about?

You need something to chase, right?

A wise kid once told me – “when playing football if there is no need to score a goal, then there won’t be a Ronaldo nor a Messi”.

Yes, after writing this I am no longer tired, weak nor exhausted!

#AmTonyWilliams

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kochaamma teacher

My Karmali Teacher aka Kochaamma

inconsolable

It feels like I have lost a good part of me when I lost you (29.09.2023)

Everything I stood for in life, and every good deed I have done so far is all that I have learned from you – my teacher!

You taught me the meaning of kindness.

You taught me to treat my enemies like my friends.

You taught me to talk in the right tone to people.

You taught me to control my anger in unfortunate situations.

You taught me how to respect people even when they disrespected me.

You taught me to laugh when people tried to humiliate me.

You taught me that food shouldn’t be wasted, as there is another you out there in hunger.

You taught me to always dress up well for any occasion outside the home.

You taught me how to make models and toys with clay.

You took care of me like a son when my parents were away for work.

I have called you amma a million times silently that you never heard, as it came out from my soul.

I know for a fact that it was you, who was behind me like a shadow, all these years praying that I never fall into the wrong group of people or do wrong things to people.

You always had a choice, but you still drained your time to help me grow into whatever I am now.

I never in my dreams thought, I would lose you the last time I saw you a couple of weeks back.

They say time will heal this, but I know that nothing other than my death itself can heal me from your loss.

Today feels heavy, I am unable to focus at times.

I think about you, and I think about you when I am alone in a time-loop.

I am unfortunately not able to imagine that you are gone.

Carrying your coffin the other day in the heavy rain felt like I was carrying my life away. Each step was difficult and heavy as I didn’t want to make it. I wanted to believe that it wasn’t you (teacher) inside that coffin.

Your loss will always be a big empty space in my life.

I am not able to cry out loud.

I am really not able to cry out loud, I tried a million times.

I am seriously not able to cry out loud at all, but I want to.

I feel so frozen when I think about you now.

Tears stand frozen too.

— My teacher, I am inconsolable…

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21 Shocking Love Secrets About Guys That Will Make You Wild

21 Shocking Love Secrets About Guys That Will Make You Wild!

So you have to read all of them and trust me you will be shocked to know all these love secrets about guys, maybe if you are a GIRL that is.

*& 1 more thing please don't misunderstand nor misrepresent the facts said below as these are the point of views from different experiences of people around about some shocking love secrets inside a guy. We don’t have any proof nor facts to support these statements mentioned below to be true. Every reader is familiar with the typical fiction disclaimer. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, business, events, and incidents are the products of the author's imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. This is a work of fiction. Any semblance between original characters and real persons, living or dead, is coincidental. The author in no way represents the companies, corporations, or brands mentioned in this book. The likeness of historical/famous figures have been used fictitiously; the author does not speak for or represent these people. All opinions expressed in this book are the author’s, or fictional.

 1) Guys may be flirting around all day, but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

 2) Mostly guys are more emotional than you think, if they loved you at one point, it’ll take them a lot longer than you think to let you go, and it hurts every second that they try.

 3) Guys go crazy over a girl’s smile, now that’s a shocking love secret about a guy?

 4) A guy who likes you wants to be that “only” guy you talk to.

 5) Giving a guy a hanging message like “You know what?…uh…never mind“; would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking. And he’ll assume he did something wrong and he’ll obsess about it, trying to figure it out all day.

 6) If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don’t need to give a piece of advice. This is the best shocking love secret about that guy any girl must remember.

 7) One usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you.

 8) A GUY LOVES YOU MORE THAN YOU LOVE HIM!!!

 9) Guys use words like hot or cute to describe girls. They rarely use beautiful or gorgeous. If a guy uses that, he loves you or likes you a whole heck of a lot. 

 10) If the guy does something stupid in front of the girl, he will think about it for the next couple of days or until the next time he spends time with the girl.

 11) If a guy looks unusually calm and laid back, he’s probably faking it and he is really thinking about something.

 12) When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl, he really is. Guys rarely say that.

 13) If at all a guy asks you to leave him alone, he’s just actually saying, “Please come closer and listen to me”.

 14) If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him. It doesn’t happen that often, so when it does, you know something’s up.

 15) When a guy looks at you for longer than a second, he’s definitely thinking something.

 16) Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions; and are MAD confusing, but somehow are drawn even more to them.

 17) A guy would give the world to be able to read a girl’s mind for a day.

 18) No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He’s just too stubborn to admit it.

 19) NOT ALL GUYS ARE RUDE!!!

       Just because ONE is RUDE doesn’t mean he represents ALL of them.

 20) WHEN A GUY SACRIFICES HIS SLEEP AND HEALTH JUST TO TALK TO YOU, HE REALLY LIKES YOU AND WANTS TO BE WITH YOU AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

 21) Let us say if you had dumped a guy months ago and he loved you, he would probably still does and if he had one wish it would be you to come back into his life.

Ladies wake up some GUY Loves you…………… Madly!

So do you know </that> guy?

Up Next

17 Shocking Secrets About Love Is Blind Revealed – E!

10 shocking secrets about love guys wish girls knew – GirlsLife

100 Secrets about Guys – Wattpad

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